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A ‘Mere’ Woman

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One thing is clear: being an African woman most likely guarantees that you will be demeaned, maltreated, considered less and be less appreciated and more prone to abuse than other women and other human beings in the world. It is the combination of two factors that individually qualify you for discrimination: being a woman first of all, then being an African. Like the saying goes, ‘It’s a man’s world’. Secondly, in almost all African traditions, the woman is considered to be less than the man, and that is putting it very mildly.

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Of Men & Idols

Byadmin

A very painful part of the aftermath of the scandal for me, is the reactions of a lot of Christians, defending their man of God and even denying the event. We do not have proof yet, whether or not the rape occurred, but the blind defense is what gets to me, and the excuses and arguments being proffered to support the positions.

Men of God are God’s servants and messengers, sent to represent Him and share His messages with the Body of Christ on earth. Because they represent God, they are to be respected. However, we must remember that they are still men and not God, so the respect we give should not be the reverence reserved for God. In addition, because they are men, they are equally susceptible to sin like all men are (men and women alike) and should not be deemed infallible, like God.

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Predator Men!

Byadmin

When a victim speaks up and is ridiculed, it brings the pain of other victims back to the surface and you suffer along, although secretly. The comfort survivors have is that God is there. He heals the broken-hearted and binds up their wounds (Psalm 147:3).

I wish there was more succor for the suffering, such as access to counselors and people who understand abuse and how to deal with it, both for the victim and for the abuser. This is because it’s not only the victim that needs help. The abuser does too.

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Part II – The Offence

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He caught Kate’s eyes in the mirror and looked away. She had given him a tentative smile which he ignored. He couldn’t wait to get off the ship and back to real life. The Linda matter had left a bad taste in his mouth. He needed a plan to show her. He found it difficult to concentrate on what he was watching. He recalled the interaction they just had. He got angry all over again. And this time, his anger arose because he didn’t know why he was so angry. Why would seeing Linda bother him so much? He regretted divorcing her. Maybe if they had just been separated, he would still have a hold on her. The divorce was meant to be a punishment. She had cried and begged him when he told her he wanted a divorce. He sighed, and Kate caught his eye again in the mirror. This time, she had a worried look. He decided to humor her. Maybe that would help take his mind off Linda. He smiled at her.

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Adultery…

Byadmin

It is a no holds barred society that we have here. Anything goes. We used to accuse the ‘oyinbos’ of being promiscuous; they have no values, they kiss in public etc.

In today’s Nigeria, especially in Lagos and other major cities, nude bars abound, strip clubs, high class prostitution dens. Nobody bats an eyelid. Nobody talks about them.

I read an article once in the newspapers, written by a like-minded man, asking parents the question – do you know what your daughter living in Abuja is up to? The man went on to reveal the activities of our politicians and rich contractors who throw money around in Abuja and how they ‘capture’ the greed of young, female Youth Corpers who were posted to spend their service year in Abuja.

‘Tis The Season To Be Jolly!

Byadmin

While enjoying the ‘jolly’ season, it would be wise not to throw all caution to the wind. Shopping can be crazy but remember to watch your spending. Merchants can be very enticing with their special offers at this time, both in the shops and on line stores. It’s good to have a list and follow it as strictly as possible. No spontaneous purchases! In fact, as much as possible, stay away from the shops once you finish your legal (list-based) shopping. That way, you can at least try to resist some temptations.

That Brute, Nabal!

Byadmin

We see them every day, wolves clothed in sheep clothing, smiling, laughing, eating and drinking like regular human beings. They engage in sane conversations, engage in business, buy and sell like lucid people. But in the secret of their homes, they shed the skin of sheep and put on their monster outfits.