Welcome to March!

I was sitting down and thinking of how fast this year was rolling by and how if you are not careful, December would come and you would have nothing to show for it. I was thinking how easy it is to fail.

The reason why a lot of people fail is that it is very easy to do! All you need to do is just do nothing, and you fail. It is every man’s default destination, failure. You don’t need any effort to fail. No advice, no nothing! Just don’t do anything. That is why succeeding is such an uphill task. Stay where you are and failure meets you there. But if you intend to succeed, you run. You run the race with all your might. And you can’t afford to stop, otherwise failure catches up with you.

If you are in school or taking classes, it is very easy to fail.Just don’t attend classes and don’t study anything. You are guaranteed to fail. But if you want to succeed, you have to attend classes religiously, actually listen to the lecturer, take notes, ask questions, read up, work on assignments, submit by the deadline, prepare for tests and exams! It takes a whole lot of work to succeed. You have to sweat. You have to work. It doesn’t come easy.

Which is why, in the last few weeks, I feel I am heading for failure. I haven’t had time to do the things I would normally do to ensure my success. And the bad part is that I have been busy doing nothing! I can’t point to anything I’ve done that is worth talking about, yet I’ve been busy. I feel I’ve settled into this crazy routine that is non-productive and I’m looking for a way out. In doing that, I found  myself in the other extreme of doing nothing. I feel failure creeping up on me. Help!

Help me! Is anybody out there? Help!

How do I explain what I need? At the beginning of the year, I was so sure I would hit the ground running. I had a plan. I had strategies. I had zeal. Right now, I just feel like I’m drowning. Trying to keep my head above water. Panting for the next breath, eyes wild and wide open. What is happening? Who cut off my air supply? Who tied weights to my legs? I’ve got to start swimming or I will drown. I need God!

It’s at times like this that I appreciate the privilege of prayer most. To be able to cry out ‘God help me’ and He answers! The psalmist says ‘My God – the high crag where I run for dear life, hiding behind the boulders, safe in the granite hideout’… ‘ The hangman’s noose was tight at my throat; devil waters rushed over me. Hell’s ropes cinched me tight; death traps barred every exit. A hostile world! I call to God, I cry to God to help me. From His place he hears my call; my cry brings me right into His presence -a private audience’ Ps.18: 2,4-6 MSG

That is what I crave for right now. That private audience with God, to bear my heart, to cry out for help, to scream if I have to… I need to ventilate my spirit, with the only One Who understands the reason why I feel like this. Because I don’t . And I don’t even want to understand. I just want a solution. If there was a short cut answer, I would take it! I’m desperate because I don’t like the way I feel. I’m not enjoying myself. My peace left. I’m lost! My heart is crying out for God, as the deer pants for the waters.

‘I want to drink God, deep draughts of God. I’m thirsty for God-alive. I wonder, ‘Will I ever make it – arrive and drink in God’s presence?’ Ps. 42:2-3 MSG

Oh, Yes, I will. I’m not giving up. I’m not waiting for failure. I’m pursuing God with all the energy and life in me. I will find Him, because I seek Him with all of my heart. ‘When you come looking for me, you’ll find me. ‘Yes, when you get serious about finding me and want it more than anything else, I’ll make sure you won’t be disappointed. God’s Decree’. (Jer. 29:13 MSG)

So, this March, I am marching on. I am on the move. I’m not waiting for failure. If I can’t run, I will walk. If I can’t walk, I will crawl. I must be moving. I am not standing still. I’m stripping off every weight and strengthening my weak knees. I am lifting up the hands that hang down and crawling, walking, running, towards my goals. Ain’t no stopping me!